Mommy Monday: Discipline

I told you that the first month of 2016 has been an eventful one; full of pain and joy; and most importantly revelation. I am definitely reminded of this meme I have shared before…

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My path is becoming clearer by the moment it seems…and those on my mailing list…I will be sharing as much as I know so far. Most of this are things I have known for some time. But it was like one of those jigsaw puzzles that I suck at. A bunch of pieces that I could not see how they could all fit together to make that pretty picture on the box.

I am getting a bit closer…I have at least found those 4 corner pieces that are the foundation. My fiction readers…breathe…yes, my writing is more than safe. I will continue the stories you love so much. And my themes of 1) life sux 2) love is the only thing that makes it worth living and 3) GREAT sex is the best way of showing that special person/people that you love them. My other messages are almost extensions of that.

First is…seeds of greatness. That we all have a purpose, a destiny, a fate…of greatness…some big and some quieter, but all equally important to this world.

Next is…a NEW feminism…one that celebrates the unique power of the feminine to nurture, heal and give life. Expect both sex and submission to have a mind blowing part in that message.

Then there is Madonna…parent…mother. It may seem strange to some that this loud, brash, New Age guru of love and sex would equally be drawn to a message of motherhood. But that is a modern construct of religion that has divided, separated and subjugated women from the moment we came out of our caves and men needed to ensure that the land they supposedly owned was passed only to their progeny. So they desexualized the wife and mother…and created the whore.

If you look at ancient and indigenous cultures you will not find that divide…and that is the thread that holds all of those messages together. We spread our legs to comfort our partners…we take them not just into the fountain of the goddess but into the safety of our arms, our bosoms…and on occasion we spread those same legs to give back to them the very life they give to us. That does not make us a whore or a Madonna…it makes us divinely feminine (please notice I did not say woman…this is gender not biology).

So to anyone who is offended by Mommy Monday right alongside of Freaky Friday and Sensual Saturday, well, I welcome you to this journey as a chance to expand and open your mind and heart to another path. But if you are so wed to your paradigm that you cannot keep an open mind…please unsubscribe. I wish you well on your path but you are not my tribe…not who I was sent to deliver this message to. And that is fine…


 

Wow, if that introduction was not mind blowing enough…I want to share with you the very core of my beliefs as a mother…

Discipline is NOT what you think it is!

Hell, you know me…I love my definitions…and after decades and centuries of commonly accepted usage even the dictionaries get it wrong. Most of the definitions I found included words like…punishment, control and acceptable behavior.

And if you want to train a precious human being, break their spirit and steal their dreams the way that yours were…go right ahead (and hit unsubscribe too). Babies are not your tabula rasa for you to write your story upon. They are born with their own encoded onto their DNA personalities.

You cannot train them like Pavlov’s dogs without damaging them. Kids are cats, not dogs. They are demanding. They want your attention and yes, will do anything to get it. They own you…you do not own them.

WTF? Then what is the point of being a parent? How do you discipline them? 

By looking at the root of that word…disciple. The noun disciple comes from the Latin word discipulus, which means “student, learner, or follower.” (https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/disciple)

You are their first and most important teacher. They are constantly following and learning from you…sometimes that is not so good. Kids do not grasp and resent the…do as I say and not as I do mentality. Unlearn it. Model the behavior you want from them.

  • If you want them to say I am sorry when they are wrong, then apologize to them when you are.
  • If you want them to pick up their toys then you help them…and keep your shit clean too.
  • If you want them to respect you, then you respect them as UNIQUE human beings with infinite value and potential equal to (or greater than) your own.
  • If you want them to eat healthy then you do it too…preferably at the table together (though that is a HUGE challenge for me…and loads of single moms).

And give them time…this method takes way more of that. You have to invest more effort into them. You have to wait for their little minds to catch up…while all your Pavlovian parenting friends have perfectly behaved Stepford kids. It is hard, folks.

That is why most parents chose that easier route…the same one of punishment, control and acceptable behavior…that fucked their own heads up, made them slaves to the system they hate and stole their dreams.

Don’t get me wrong…they love their kids too. They just are so caught up in that system that they do not have the courage to break free of it…even for their children. So they do to them what was done to them. And so the screwed up societal systems continue…

But hell, if you have read this damned far…then I think you are looking for something better for them…and for you. So I hope you will visit Mommy Monday again with that open mind and heart.

Goddess bless and lead you to YOUR path.

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