Tiffany is another of my wonderful readers, who has stepped up and taken the challenge to expose a bit of flesh…and her soul on REAL Woman Wednesday. Join me in welcoming her as she shares some pretty deep insights with us.
Me: So thank you, Tiffany for helping me to spread the word that REAL love and GREAT sex is not just for the young, rich and thin. So let’s jump right into it. What do you think makes a good hero in erotica/romance?
Tiffany: Hmmm that’s a tough one … Someone that’s relatable. I remember after I read 50 shades of gray, I was explaining the plot to him, and he said to me, “you know I’ll never be a billionaire Dom, right?” And that’s when it hit me, that fantasy stories like that are fun, but stories where the characters are relatable and realistic, are a million times better.
Me: So relatable in fiction Doms…what about in REAL ones? What do you think makes a good one?
Tiffany: A man? Or a Dom?
Me: Good answer…both.
Tiffany: Well the best real life example I have is my husband. We’re very much opposites. He balances me out. My anxiety can get to the best of me sometimes, and he’s perfected his ability to calm me down. We always joke that his wife is more crazy than his patients (he’s a doctor) but despite that he loves me, and treats me well so I think a man that can love you in spite of your flaws and treats you respect is a good man.
I’ve never had a Dom before, but I imagine a Bjorn, Sven, and Mikal rolled into one would be the perfect one.
Me: *laughing* Yeah…well it took three of them to make a good one then.
Tiffany: In all seriousness, I think it just depends on the person. It’s all about needs, and if they’re being met or not. My needs are not your needs. Your Doms might not be a good fit for me and vice versa.
Me: And that is very wise advice. Very wise indeed. It is coming up on that special time…the holidays. Do you have a favorite holiday memory?
Tiffany: Yes. I think I was about five or six, and we were driving home from my grandparents on Christmas Eve, and we saw a shooting star, and my dad told me it was Santa’s sleigh. I just remember the magical feeling thinking that I saw Santa’s sleigh.
Me: That does sound magical for a little girl. Do you have any holiday traditions?
Tiffany: Well every year I buy my husband and I Christmas Jammie’s. He’s such a trooper lol
Me: Oh, no, you know I MADE all my kids onsies last year. Fuzzy. Hoods. And animal prints.
Tiffany: I don’t know if I could get away with onsies. *giggles*
Me: Sounds like we are pretty lucky this time of year. The holidays are not always easy for those without family or close friends and those with mental health issues.
Tiffany: Yeah, we are, but even then all of us face challenges. Something that might resonate with real women, especially this time of year, is the fact that my husband and I have been trying for a year to get pregnant with no luck. We just started testing. Infertility is not something people like to talk about. Everyone just loves to hound you about when you’re going to have kids. Little do they know, every time someone asks me that, it kills me a little inside. And I am sure there will be plenty of that during the holidays.
Me: That is REALly important to talk about. You know I had a miscarriage six years ago that sent me deep into depression…and honestly the hardest part of being fifty is knowing I won’t have any more children.
Tiffany: Look on the bright side, you’ll have grandchildren someday. For me, it’s just hard when everyone and their dog is getting pregnant and you can’t seem to.
Me: How do you manage all those comments?
Tiffany: I usually deflect them with something along the lines of we’re having fun trying and then people get all weird.
Me: I love embarrassing people like that. But what do you wish they would know or do? Is there anything?
Tiffany: Just that you don’t know the struggles people face. Also there are people in the world who genuinely don’t want children, and that’s ok too. Really it’s no one’s business about your reproductive choices, but you and your partner or sperm donor, or whoever.
Me: Sounds perfect…and thank you not only for bearing your body but especially your soul/heart. Maybe I could or should do a Serious Sunday on the issue. You know in The Arrangement…Simone and Samuel struggle with it too…they managed to have one daughter but could not get pregnant again.
Tiffany: Yeah absolutely. I always love chatting with you. You’re like chicken soup for the soul to me.
Me: Spicy/kinky kind though…may I use that quote sometime?
Me: And keep us posted. You know I have not had a pregnant REAL Woman yet. I remember the scandal when Demi Moore posed nude on the cover of Vanity Fair when she was pregnant. So…
Tiffany: I’m probably going to end up with six kids now that you say that. *laughing*
Me: From your lips to the goddess’s and Fate’s ears…rubbing your head for luck! Thank you so very very much for this! And for perhaps making someone pause and think before blurting out THAT question around the dinner table this holiday season.